


On the Oil Rig

by supernatural9917



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Meta, oil rig
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2019-03-12 11:59:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13546881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supernatural9917/pseuds/supernatural9917
Summary: Based on the oil rig discussions in the Cockles panel fromHonCon 2017(from around 19 minutes; the accent is mentioned around 28 minutes). A bit of silly sort of meta :)





	On the Oil Rig

_On an oil rig somewhere in the north Atlantic…_

Dean huffed his way into the room he shared with fellow engineer Castiel, slamming the door for good measure. Castiel looked up from his tablet with a raised eyebrow.

'Something wrong, Dean?'

'Yeah. They've cancelled the screenings of Unnatural!'

'So you'll have to wait for shore leave to catch up with the adventures of monster-hunting brothers Sal and Dirk?' Castiel asked with a teasing grin. 'How come?'

'Gordon is claiming that it's because of a copyright issue, but I think it's just because he's still pissed about the time the angel Cotswold did that terrible oil rig accent. I mean, yeah, it was kind of offensive, but he went on Twitter and apologised afterwards. What's the big deal?'

'I'm sorry. I guess you'll have to find something else to do with your Thursday evenings.'

'Easy for you to say, you stopped watching it ages ago.'

'Yes, I just lost interest after a while,' Castiel said vaguely. Dean flopped down next him on the bunk and tried to look over his shoulder.

'What are you up doing? Reading anything good?'

Castiel blushed and tried to hide the screen, but Dean just reached over and grabbed it from his hands. 'Dean, don't-'

'Whoa, is this Unnatural fanfiction?' Dean smiled as he scrolled down, and then his eyes widened in surprise. 'Uh, OK, gay porn fanfiction. Dirk and Cotswold, really? You know they're not a couple on the show, right?'

'That's why I stopped watching,' Castiel said coolly, taking the tablet back from Dean. 'Dirkwold is heavily supported by the subtext, and if Cotswold were a female character, they would definitely have gotten together by now. Instead they just dangle queerbait to the audience one week and then have Dirk sleep with some random waitress the next just to keep him canonically straight. I got sick of it.'

'Huh, I guess I never really thought about it. They do stare at each other a lot. And Dirk _was_ super fucked up when Cotswold died the last time.'

'Exactly,' Castiel agreed enthusiastically. 'And then when Cotwsold came back, Dirk was suddenly all cheerful again. He was downright giddy when they got that case at Cape Canaveral.'

Dean snorted a laugh. 'Yeah, that's because Dirk is _obsessed_ with astronauts. I thought he was gonna cream his pants when he got to try on the space suit.'

'I thought he was going to cream his pants when he got _Cotswold_ to try on the space suit.'

'And you said you weren’t watching it!'

'I wasn't. I saw posts about it on Tumblr. That episode was _very_ popular with the fandom.'

Dean stole the tablet again and started properly reading the story Castiel had open. 'Jesus, Cas. This is pretty graphic stuff. Seriously, do we need a description of every finger going wherever?' He continued scrolling, occasionally laughing or snorting in disbelief. 'Come on, no way Dirk is flexible enough for that position. Sal's the one who does yoga.'

'Nobody's making you read it, Dean,' Castiel grumbled. 'Personally I was enjoying the story, and my Thursday evening alone time. I'll help you talk Gordon into reinstating the Unnatural showings so I get my hour a week to myself again.'

'What would you have been doing if I hadn't come in, Cas? Does this stuff get you off? Did I interrupt your evening of self love?'

'Shut up,' Castiel retorted, blushing and shoving Dean's shoulder to get his personal space back; but Dean wasn't having it. He pushed Castiel down onto the bed and climbed over him.

'Or maybe you were just getting ideas for when I got back. Don't think I haven't noticed that you're especially creative on Thursday nights. Been reading dirty stories just to spice things up, haven't you?' He nibbled Castiel's earlobe and down his neck, gently so as not to leave any marks. His hands began to wander, and soon he was running a palm over the firm bulge in Castiel's pyjama bottoms.

'It worked, didn't it?' Cas moaned as Dean's grip tightened. 'I certainly didn't hear you complain last week when I brought out the bungee cords.'

'That's because you gagged me with your tie before you roped me to the bed,' Dean reminded him, his tone not suggesting the least problem with the scenario that had unfolded the previous Thursday.

'Mmm, yes I did, didn't I? In hindsight, that was a mistake on my part; I should have made you call me master first.' With impressive strength, Castiel flipped their positions so that he was now on top of Dean. 'Now, what shall I do with you tonight? I have so many ideas…'

'Hey Cas?' Dean said softly, moving a hand up to cup Castiel's jaw. 'You know that you don't have to go all kinkmaster extraordinaire to keep me interested right?' Castiel bit his lip and looked away, embarrassed at having been caught thinking exactly that. 'Hey, sweetheart, listen. I know it's our anniversary coming up, but the seven year itch is a movie, not a real thing. I love you just as much today as I did when we said I do, and I don't need you to slap me during sex while wearing a Zorro mask to keep me wanting you.'

'But you did like it when I did that.'

'Of course I liked it, but that's not the point. The point is, you don't have to come up with something new and crazy every week for me to want to fuck your brains out. You just have to be you.'

Castiel gave his husband a sweet kiss. 'Thank you, Dean. I love you too. But, um… would you _mind_ if I still occasionally got some ideas from dirty stories, just for fun?'

'I think I can live with that.'


End file.
